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| Dr. Stupid's debut
match! Check out his bio for his
first roleplay, the only one for this matchup!
[Indeed, we cut.] [Dr. Stupid is arriving in the building, our fat friend Elisa Lords is there to meet him. ] (As Chris gets out of his beat-up Chrysler LeBaron outside before the match, he runs into ELisa Lords, not hard to do considering her size) Elisa: Chris, this is your first match. How do you think you'll do? Chris: I'm gonna win my first match here in BLT... Elisa: You mean LCW? Chris(ignoring her for now): ...with no trouble! I don't even anticipate having to cheat much. Elisa: You don't even know the name of the fed, you idiot! How do you expect to win? Chris:hey, take it easy! I'll...uhhhh....that is....it's a secret! Elisa: Sure. Well, good luck. You'll need it! Chris: I don't need luck! I'm all ready! Elisa: so you've been working out a lot? Chris: Yep, if by working out you mean eating granola bars. High fiber, you know! Cleans everything out great! Elisa: That's a lovely
image, Doc.
[Commercials.] [Back.]
JA: Welcome back fans!
We're going right to the ring!
[Without any notice or forewarning..] [The techno beats of Rob Zombie's "Scum of the Earth" cuts into the silence, quickly filling each corner of the arena. The fans stand, and turn their heads to entrance.] [No fancy pyro, no nothing of that sort. Onto the ramp steps Trey Magnus, wearing nothing but his ring attire - wrestling shorts that cut off high at on his thigh, which have a gold trim along the edges and waist. He lifts his taped wrists into the hair, wiggling his fingers through the finger gloves to get comfortable.] [In a gentle, but deliberate pace, he glides down the aisle, slightly cocky swagger taking him to the steps. He has pride, oh yes. He pauses, bows his head, and runs a gloved hand through his fluffy curled hair, and steps into the ring.] [Magnus slaps the turnbuckle, and begins his short mental preparations.] [And now.. he's ready.]
EW: Trey Magnus eats monkey balls. JA: EUGENE! EW: Just filling the
dead air.
(lights go pale red Eddie Money's "Two Tickets to Paradise" begins playing as he appears on the ramp, with a box of Chewy granola bars and a Krazy Ed'z Dizkount Airlinez ticket envelope.) JA: And here comes newcomer Chris "Dr. Stupid" Insalano! We'll see if this math teacher can teach Trey Magnus a thing or two! EW: He's refused the help of everyone he's met this week! I think it'll be Magnus who takes Stupid to school today! Got a surprise especially for you, (He points to Lisa, one of his students who is in the front row) JA: Dr. Stupid is pointing to a 14 year-old girl in the crowd, sort of addressing the song to her! I wonder what that's about! EW: C'mon Jimmy, I think it's pretty obvious what's going on here! JA: Right you are...Chris was fired from his old teaching job for an improper relationship with a student! Looks like he's up to his old tricks! ##We've waited so long,
waited so long.
(he points out the
door)
##I've got two tickets
in my pocket##
(puts tickets in his
pocket)
##now baby,
(Chris just stands
at the bottom of the ramp eating the granola bars.)
EW: Looks like Chris
has run out of actions to fit his song here! I guess he figures he better
enjoy some Chewys while he has the chance! After all, with his lack of
preparation you gotta wonder if he'll have a mouth to put 'em in after
this!
##I've got two tickets
to paradise,
I'm gonna take you
on a trip so far from here,
(as the song ends,
Chris tries to get in the ring, but struggles getting over the ropes. He
tries to squeeze through and fails. Finally he tries to get under the ropes
and has to get several of his students in the front row to help him)
EW: That pitiful display is mercifully over! Whoever came up with that must be a moron! JA: Well, Chris does
his own entrances, so you're right!
[DING DING DING]
JA: Here we go! EW: Magnus is gonna wipe the floor with this queef. JA: Magnus charges, lariat! Dr. Stupid goes down! Magnus pulls him up, irish whip, powerslam! EW: Another squash, here we go. JA: Magnus pulls Chris
up, kick to the gut, DDT! Cover...
One...
TWO....
KICKOUT! EW: Eh, wish it'd just end. JA: Dr. Stupid leaning against the ropes, Magnus charges, Dr. Stupid sticks out his foot and it drives into Magnus' groin! Magnus backs away mouth open.. EW: What the!? JA: Dr. Stupid is stuffing chewy bars into his mouth. Magnus is doubled over spitting them out, Dr. Stupid off of the ropes, Elbow to the back of his head! Magnus is down! EW: The world is a messed up place. JA: Dr. Stupid twists Magnus' ankle and lifts him up and drops him! Magnus limping around hurt. Where is Dr. Stupid going! EW: He's getting his stein. JA: Ugh. EW: I'm with you. (Chris sneaks
up behind Magnus, beer stein in hand)
JA: Uh-Oh, this is going to be ugly. Stupid is going to try out one of his dirty tricks here! EW: That stein looks heavy! Hope Magnus has a hard head! (As he starts to raise
the stein, the crowd, led by his students, starts chanting "SMASH AND SLASH!
SMASH AND SLASH!")
JA: The crowd knows
where this is headed!
(Chris clunks Magnus
with the stein, then slashes his arm with the broken handle)
EW: That was brilliant! Stupid's Super Stein Smash-Slash is a great move for a guy in his first match! JA: That was really cheap! EW: He's going to the top rope! He's going to win, good lord! JA: He waits for Magnus to stand...HE LEAPS! THE STUPID SPIN AND SLAM! EW: Wow, not bad. JA: Dr. Stupid covers...
One...
TWO........
THREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! Dr. Stupid wins! EW: Look at him strutting past the little girls in his class. JA: That is disturbing.
[Commercial] [Back.] [Back-STAGE in fact, teehee...sorry] |